If you would have asked me years ago if I would homeschool my kids, I would have laughed at you. I never saw myself as a full time homeschool mom. I considered myself a Montessori mom when the boys were little. I strived for purposeful play and bought every Melissa and Doug wooden “toy” I could find. I read many books on Montessori methods and applied a lot of the techniques to our day to day. However, when the day came for my child to get on that yellow school bus, I stood outside and waited with him. It was a rite of passage that all kids before him had done, including myself. It is what is supposed to happen right?
I didn’t know any better until I began working in the public school. My eyes were peeled back, and I did not like what I was seeing. Children being led from room to room. They were told what they were supposed to write about. Art projects were a clear step- by- step don’t go out of the box creative less venture. They were little robots. Rewarded for being “good” and punished for being “bad”. No grey area, simply one or the other. If they did happen to fall in the middle, they were ignored. Leave well enough alone I guess. I knew that my boys deserved better. It was just a matter of my priorities.
I believe the art of homeschooling lies in the ability to let go of norms. It means really tuning into your children and honing in on what they need, like, and excel at. Not saying that you can’t do other things, but homeschool really does need to be your priority. If you’ve made the decision to keep them home with you, you need to be ready to sacrifice a lot of what you want to do. What I mean by this is that it is extremely important to be flexible. We as the teacher need to be willing to learn as well. I am constantly researching what I can be doing to help encourage my boys in areas they need help in. I am also looking for ways to enhance what we are learning to make it as engaging as possible. It doesn’t have to be fancy or cost a lot of money, but it does have to be done.
Learning has to be directed at each child’s individual need. For example my nine year old likes to pace around the room while I am reading history. At first this drove me crazy. I was trying to conform him to my way of learning. Sit down and be quiet. What I noticed was when I let him pace he would be able to recall any question about the chapter I asked him. When he was sitting next to me quietly he couldn’t answer any question. Now our history class is in the living room on the couch. My eleven year old will cuddle up next to me and the youngest walks around the room.
I also find that getting them out of the house is so important. We go spend time at the library, book store, parks, etc. One of our favorite outings is to go to Barnes and Noble and sit and read. I let them get a decaffeinated drink from Starbucks and settle in on the couches. They learn so much from the interactions they receive with other people and observing. When I go to the grocery store I like to take one boy with me. I let them order the meat from the counter, decide on which food items we need and the best prices, wring out the food at the self check out, and bag it up. That right there is a real life skill lesson that many kids don’t get to experience.
When my kids were in public school I rarely took the time to do these things with them. It was already done before they got home, or it was just faster to do it alone. They wouldn’t get home from school until 4. Then it was dinner and activities if we had any and bedtime. I never tried to fit anything else in the evenings as they were already worn out from the day. Then I would have such guilt for not spending as much time with them as I’d like.
The experiences we have now are so much more than what I’d ever imagined. The conversations we have are second to none. It is so nice to be able to go down a rabbit hole with them if they are interested in something. I like to seek out classes or people they can speak to about what they are interested in to gain even more knowledge. Our family culture has grown so much since we began homeschooling. I can really see the values we have tried to impose on our children coming to fruition. They are able to practice them everyday with the freedom to be themselves.
They are no longer a number and type casted in a box. They are individuals with needs, dreams, and interests. I am able to make sure that they are finally seen. Just them feeling heard and seen has given us so much this year alone. The confidence I’m seeing in them that hasn’t always been there. They are no longer afraid to be who they are meant to be.
“Homeschooled students are isolated and at urgent risk of harm from maltreatment, under-education, and parental abuse. ” Harvard Law School professor Elizabeth Bartholet. When I read this the first time I was filled with rage. This statement could not be further from the truth of what I see from our homeschool community. After thinking about it a bit more I began to feel empowered. You know if that is what people think then I will prove them wrong. I will show everyone how amazing, educated, and well rounded homeschool kids can be. Classrooms can be anywhere. There is no rule that says it has to take place inside of four walls. Our kids can learn from anywhere in the world, as long as they have us to guide them. As long as we prioritize their educational needs, the world is their oyster!